As modern-day women, we have a lot of external freedom: the freedom to vote, the freedom to choose whom we want to marry, and the freedom to work at pretty much any job that lights our fire. These freedoms are relatively new for women – if you think about the lives of women even as recently as 100 years ago you’ll see how far we have come.
But what I’ve noticed is that while we have tremendous external freedom as Western women, we often don’t have as much internal freedom. If you are like most women you are probably still chained to old patterns of constantly comparing yourself to others, fiercely judging yourself when you make mistakes, and draining self-doubt. Sound familiar?
The remedy begins with committing to yourself fully. Not to who you think you are supposed to be, or who others want you to be. But to the authentic, wise woman who is waiting patiently to emerge, like a glorious flower after the spring rains. As women we have a lot of old beliefs and patterns to shed, which is why we need the superpowers of two important qualities: our warrior clarity and our goddess receptivity.
The warrior energy helps us to bring fierce focus, discipline, and 100% yes to everything we do. The goddess energy reminds us to open fully to life and to be creative and joyful with everything that we encounter. When we blend these two energies within us we have the inner strength and resiliency to rediscover the power within.
Here are the ten steps to reclaiming your mojo, voice, and warrior goddess sass.
As a warrior goddess commit to doing your best to:
No longer abandon yourself
Stop comparing yourself to who you think you should be, and judging yourself for not being perfect (or skinny enough or smart enough or whatever enough.) Make a commitment right now to practice accepting yourself exactly as you are. Every time you start to abandon yourself through judgment or comparison, take a breath. Put one hand on your heart and one on your belly. Come back home to this moment and this being, and let yourself know you are here for yourself, no matter what.
Learn to love the beginnings and the endings
Life is a cycle, not a straight line of accomplishment. As you come back into alignment with the cycles of life you honor the times of birth and the times of death. Sometimes you may need to nourish and feed something that is just beginning in your life – a new relationship, a new job, a new project. And simultaneously you might be midwifing something that is ending – an old way of being, your youngest child moving out of the house, a friendship. When you honor the beauty of all transitions, even the challenging ones, you will find yourself relaxing into the potency of change in all its forms.
Treat yourself as a temple
Your physical body is sacred, as is your emotional body and your mental body. Often we don’t realize how cluttered and unhelpful our thoughts are, and how our mind judges and berates our body or tries to control our emotions. When you treat yourself as a temple you will learn to love your mind, emotions, and body, and also know that your precious self needs some cleaning! Bring your compassion and care to clearing out any internal clutter by exploring what old beliefs you are carrying that no longer serve you.
Honor my sassy, sweet fire
Time to rev up your passion, creativity, and sexuality! Your sexuality is your life force, and the source of a vital energy that brings juice to everything you do. It doesn’t matter whether you are celibate or partnered, claiming your sexual and sensual flow is for you, not for anyone else. When you say yes to opening and healing and honoring your sexuality you’ll find your creativity and passion for life will blossom.
Own your strength and vulnerability
You are powerful. But power doesn’t mean always having to do everything yourself, or pushing through tough times; it means finding your inner resiliency and your loving discipline. It is also a huge part of your strength to name and honor your vulnerability. Being strong doesn’t mean not being afraid, it means being afraid and loving yourself through the fear. And a great strength is your ability to name where you feel vulnerable and hold yourself steady.
Open your heart to all of life
We often learn to close our hearts when we are hurt or afraid, or around things we don’t like or do not understand. But when we close our hearts we are closing off to our own wisdom, compassion, and creativity. It is a deep practice to explore how to open your heart to everything: the wonderful and the awful, the sweet and the stinky. Start small by breathing into your heart and turning towards things you would usually close to. Can you breathe into your heart and soften into opening while you are in traffic, when you smell something you don’t like, or when someone is angry at you. Practice!
Speak your deepest truths
As women we often squish our voices by trying to please others, or by trying to always “be nice” or not offend anyone. But the world needs your unique voice. In order to speak your deepest truths you need to first learn to listen to yourself, and learn what your truth is. Be patient and kind to yourself, and know that you are on a journey to become more intimate with who you truly are. Be curious and open. And then share yourself fully.
Listen to the wisdom within
Within you is a source of so much groovy information and support, just waiting to be tapped. It takes a willingness to get quiet and listen beneath your thoughts and fears and doubts to hear your intuition and inner wisdom. Your intuition is that voice within that doesn’t shout or freak out, but quietly, calmly tells you what to do next, or shares information. Your intuition is part of your innate wisdom, or what the Toltecs call “silent knowledge.” Spend time connecting to this wisdom through your listening and stillness.
Claim your unique path
There is no one like you. You are a beautiful star of a woman, exactly the way you are. I know, your head is saying but I am too fat, or too lazy or too stressed. Those are all thoughts. The reality is you are precious. You are growing, learning, expanding. And how you create your life is your art, and no one can do it like you. So claim your wild, quirky, creative self. No more comparison; nurture yourself as if you were your own best friend. Because that makes life so much more fun!
These ten steps to reclaiming your Warrior Goddess are not linear; they are a circle of support to remind you of what is important. May you embody these ten actions and let your radiant, brilliant Warrior Goddess light shine.
Editor’s Note: For more from HeatherAsh, join the Warrior Goddess Tribe Facebook Page to have instant community of supportive women. And learn more about Warrior Goddess Training in this video:
Warrior Goddess Training by HeatherAsh Amara
HeatherAsh Amara is the founder of Toci – the Toltec Center of Creative Intent – and the author of The Toltec Path of Transformation: Embracing the Four Elements of Change. She travels extensively, giving lectures and teaching workshops around the world. Her mission is to help women and men find and live in their authenticity.